The Peculiar Truth about Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp

• In the early 70s, animated cartoon shows dominated the big three American TV networks every Saturday morning. A few live action programs like HR Pufnstuf and The Banana Splits stood out, too.

• For adults, spy movies and TV series like the James Bond films and The Man from U.N.C.L.E. were all the rage in that era. So were music-based shows like The Monkees and The Partridge Family.

• Two men with television experience but no history in Saturday morning programming combined all of those cultural elements into one strange kids’ show.

• Instead of cartoon characters or puppets, however, each episode featured chimpanzees. Humans did voiceovers and narration, but the main performers onscreen were real live apes.

• The show was called Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp.

• Stan Burns and Mike Marmer created the series. They were seasoned TV comedy writers who wrote for The Tonight Show with Steve Allen, The Smothers Brothers, and Flip Wilson. They also contributed to Get Smart!, which was the brainchild of Mel Brooks and Buck Henry.

• In a pitch meeting with ABC, they presented the idea of a spy spoof with chimps. The network bought it.

• They were given a budget of well over $1 million. In 1970 that was an astronomical sum, especially for a kids’ show.

• The apes had no training, of course, so before filming could begin they had to teach the chimps to walk upright and wear clothes and wigs. They were also taught to open their mouths as if speaking. Human vocals were then improvised to match.

• The show’s storyline: Lancelot Link was a secret agent working for A.P.E. (Agency to Prevent Evil). His female cohort was Mata Hairi. A.P.E.’s leader was Darwin. Their nemesis was CHUMP, an organization of bad guys that included Duchess, Ali Asa Seen, and Wang Fu among others.

• The episodes had no coherent plots. Sometimes Lancelot was a spy, sometimes he wasn’t. One episode had all the apes skiing. In another Lancelot portrayed The Lone Ranger. Then he was a magician. An ape portrayed Ed Sullivan. For some reason, the voice of Lancelot sounded like an imitation of Walter Matthau.

• Lancelot had a psychedelic rock band called The Evolution Revolution. The chimps were dressed as “hippies,” given instruments, and pretended to perform bubblegum pop/rock music ala The Monkees.

• Studio musicians created original tunes just for the show. A real album by The Evolution Revolution was released.

• So were Lancelot Link school lunch boxes, thermoses, and other marketing materials common in that era.

• While the show entertained kids, the chimps were not happy.

• On location shoots, some apes ran away, only to be found later hiding in the woods. Some of the simian actors would disrobe and refuse to participate.

• The chimp who played Lancelot Link hated his veterinarian so badly that he attacked the doctor and bit a chunk out of the man’s back.

• Worst of all, before principal photography began in San Diego, the male chimps were castrated. The females were in heat, so castration was believed to be the best way to prevent rampant animal sex. No such thing would ever be permitted in Hollywood today.

• The show ended after only 17 episodes. It ran from January 1 to April 15, 1970.

• Burns and Marmer later won an Emmy for their writing on The Carol Burnett Show.

• The chimps spent the remainder of their lives in zoos and shelters and never worked in show business again.